Write Your Own Rules

When I was a kid, I remember pretending to like root beer for the longest time. At birthday parties, post-soccer game pizza outings, sleepovers...if there was root beer, I was all over it. Root beer was cool. But I hated it (still do). I thought that I could learn to love it. Learn to love...oh how that theory morphs into bigger and badder things with bigger and badder consequences as we age. I didn't learn to love root beer. I didn't even learn to tolerate it.

We are too often so wrapped up in conforming to every opinion but our own, and yet our growth and personal evolution is dependent on our interactions with those around us. A pickle, indeed. As such, writing your own set of rules does not necessarily mean going against those around you, rebelling if you will. The decisions any thoughtful person would make are with those that they love and respect in mind.

First and foremost, don't listen to what I, or anyone else, tells you is right for you (okay, I recognize that sentence is a contradiction in itself, so if making your own rules isn't your cup of tea, by all means, carry on your merry way).

Stop caring so much about what other people think ALL THE TIME. Loosen the filter, say what's on your mind, pull a Jennifer Lawrence.

If you are unhappy with your life, live it differently. It's easy to preach the extreme of these notions (i.e. "If you're unhappy with you job, change it!" "If you're unhappy in love, get out!"). We all know that these things are so much easier said than done, but that's because they are processes. That stuff doesn't happen over night or even in the course of a month. The first step is changing the game. Add an inch of progress every day. Keep moving no matter how small each step is. Keep going so long as the direction you are going is in the direction of what you are headed toward. Walk into a job you hate with a new set of rules. A set of rules that enables you to find a niche that you do enjoy. Or enables you to either feel like you won when you got fired, or quit gracefully with well wishes and solid recommendations. Or, if circumstances call for it, like this...

We are groomed to remain in the lanes of the orchestrated route generated by the LIFE GPS. The route to anticipated success and happiness. The goulash of life includes pinches of "marketable" degrees, "respectable" careers, marriage by 'x' age, babies by 'x' age, etc, etc. There is nothing necessarily wrong with this hearty life stew--maybe goulash is your dish of choice--but let's be real here, goulash isn't for everyone. Not every digestive tract is made to support the ingredients of said goulash. No one should be forced into unwanted flavors, bouts of nausea, or unexpected gas.

Why is it that more often than not, what we are truly passionate about, the things we live for, are what we allot 10% of our time to...if we're lucky?

Why is it so hard for us to realize that trying to impress people is just all kinds of bass-ackwards? This is especially true when it comes to relationships. Why would you want to be with someone when a requirement of the relationship entails being on point at all times in an elaborate facade? Even if it is only a teensy facade...why bother? And not just romantic relationships, but friendships too.

What would you honestly say if asked: "What do you have to say for yourself?" And not even in a hostile way...just what do you have to say...about you? Who are you? What are you doing? Why?

I am not claiming to be a saint in the theories I am preaching AT ALL. I'm as guilty as the rest of you. But one thing I can say, for better or worse, I am fairly comfortable in who I am. This was not always the case...in fact, not even close. But now I can proudly say that I am more often than not, unafraid to SOUND MY BARBARIC YAWP OVER THE ROOFTOPS OF THE WORLD:

So here are just a handful of my rules: 

Don't be afraid to "say the first thing that pops into your head even if it's full of gibberish."

Don't be afraid to admit things like not particularly caring for bacon (guilty).

Don't be afraid to call out the duck faced camera-kissing ladies by taking it to the next level and adding morning hair shock therapy.

So hawt.

Don't be afraid to boogie...wedding, bar, coffee shop, living room, street corner, cubicle...you name it. For me at least, if muh jam is on you best believe I be jammin'.

Don't be afraid to take a leap of faith even if you may flop.

Don't be afraid of a shameless photo bomb...not even in Vatican City.

...or the kitchen.

Don't be afraid to giddily stuff your face when circumstances call for nothing less.

 

Don't be afraid to run gleefully through the streets, no matter how you may look doing it. 

Perhaps the boiler plate just so happens to be the right road for you. Perhaps it's not. The point I'm trying to make, which may have gotten lost in the mud, is don't settle. Don't settle for anyone else, and moreover, don't settle for the written path you've allowed the world to convince you is the right one. 

"We are fools for worms, lads..."

Make your lives extraordinary (you'll notice that the word extraordinary...extra-ordinary...does not necessaily mean extravagant. Small changes can go a long way).

And finally, as my good ol' hero, Amy Poehler says...